The Tough Ones

What I have to say isn't very cheery this week, but it's pretty honest.  It's perfectly all right if you disagree with any of these.  In fact, I'd urge you to find something that you think differently about.  This is just what I've been hit with this week.

1.  The wrinkles you iron into something yourself are the hardest to get out.

All I wanted was to get the silly creases out of the shirt I was going to wear, but I continued to iron in wrinkles that took at least three times as long to get out as it did to put in.  I've noticed that about friendships as well.  It is so incredibly easy to create a riff.  To say something wrong; to do something wrong; to take something wrong; to hurt someone unintentionally.  And it takes what feels like forever and a  day to straighten it all back out again.  The more I iron, the more I realize that there are some things that will iron themselves out with persistence, but others...well, other things just never do quite go back to normal.  Which is why...

2.  Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold'em, know when to walk away, and know when to run.
Kenny Rogers is a pretty smart man if I do say so myself. I've been going through another one of those lovely little country music phases (lounging around the house all day will do that to you), and one day, this song came blaring out of the radio speakers.
Let me say this:  I've never been a gambler, but there is a lot of truth behind that song.  When conflict arises, it's important to know which battles to fight, which ones to just stand your ground on, and which ones to back down from.  I fail miserably at discerning between them sometimes, but I know the difference is vital, especially if you're planning on holding onto friends.  Some things, you've got to fight for (like the cheesy "get the girl back" antics in movies), but at the same time, folks don't like being suffocated--know when to walk away.

Finally, my years of being a Jurassic Park fan are paying off.
This lesson was actually a theme in the third movie.

3.  Even the best intentions can lead to the worst decisions.
This may be too personal.  Maybe it's too cruel to post on the internet, or maybe it's something that no one really cares about, but it has been sucking the life out of me like a leech, so skip this lesson if you'd rather not hear.  In attempts to keep from hurting others, I am quickly being assured that I have done just that.  Cryptic ways to escape dates, and using sugar-coated words to deliver the truth have injured more people than I can name.  Although my intentions were to keep the punch from ever being delivered, it seems that my method of escaping such an action was more like a drop kick to the face.  So...


4.  When it comes to hurting someone, apologize whether you think you were wrong or not.
Folks will disagree with me on this, and that's all right.  It just continues to ring true in my life.  There will be times when you're put between a rock and a hard place, where no matter what decision you make, someone is going to be disappointed.  The truth is going to hurt, and no matter how many kind words you toss in there, when you get right down to the nitty gritty, you're still practically hitting them in the face.  So when the smoke clears, don't go back on your decision.  Hold the ground you knew you had to own, but don't be heartless--at least apologize.  It gives value to the other person, and although it may not make everything peachy, it is at least a way to care.  Because the real trouble comes when you stop caring about the way you make someone feel.

And in the spirit of being totally and completely unrelated to the rest of a conversation...

5.  Learn to laugh at yourself.
I'm stealing this from probably every piece of advice I've heard, but I firmly believe that a certain level of sanity that is found in laughing at yourself.  Like this week, for example.
I had those lovely wisdom teeth of mine removed, and in the midst of writing my last will and testament as soon as the anesthesia began to wear off, I got to see a reflection of myself.  Despite the...well...not-so-lovely recovery moments, I had to laugh at the fact that I looked like an obese chipmunk.  I would show you a picture, but I'm not laughing quite that hard.  =]  Here's the best I can do:

Life exponentially increases in goodness when you can find something to laugh at in the midst of something that could make you cry.  So when someone decides it's a good idea to poke fun at you, instead of acting like a drama queen and pulling out the water works, all because someone laughed at your awkwardness, weird shaped nose, or unjustifiable clumsiness, just laugh along with them.  No one wants to be around someone who requires others to walk on eggshells.

Well that's that.  Have a blessed day.  =]

³ And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; ⁴ and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; ⁵ and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.   

Romans 5:3-5