The Tough Ones

What I have to say isn't very cheery this week, but it's pretty honest.  It's perfectly all right if you disagree with any of these.  In fact, I'd urge you to find something that you think differently about.  This is just what I've been hit with this week.

1.  The wrinkles you iron into something yourself are the hardest to get out.

All I wanted was to get the silly creases out of the shirt I was going to wear, but I continued to iron in wrinkles that took at least three times as long to get out as it did to put in.  I've noticed that about friendships as well.  It is so incredibly easy to create a riff.  To say something wrong; to do something wrong; to take something wrong; to hurt someone unintentionally.  And it takes what feels like forever and a  day to straighten it all back out again.  The more I iron, the more I realize that there are some things that will iron themselves out with persistence, but others...well, other things just never do quite go back to normal.  Which is why...

2.  Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold'em, know when to walk away, and know when to run.
Kenny Rogers is a pretty smart man if I do say so myself. I've been going through another one of those lovely little country music phases (lounging around the house all day will do that to you), and one day, this song came blaring out of the radio speakers.
Let me say this:  I've never been a gambler, but there is a lot of truth behind that song.  When conflict arises, it's important to know which battles to fight, which ones to just stand your ground on, and which ones to back down from.  I fail miserably at discerning between them sometimes, but I know the difference is vital, especially if you're planning on holding onto friends.  Some things, you've got to fight for (like the cheesy "get the girl back" antics in movies), but at the same time, folks don't like being suffocated--know when to walk away.

Finally, my years of being a Jurassic Park fan are paying off.
This lesson was actually a theme in the third movie.

3.  Even the best intentions can lead to the worst decisions.
This may be too personal.  Maybe it's too cruel to post on the internet, or maybe it's something that no one really cares about, but it has been sucking the life out of me like a leech, so skip this lesson if you'd rather not hear.  In attempts to keep from hurting others, I am quickly being assured that I have done just that.  Cryptic ways to escape dates, and using sugar-coated words to deliver the truth have injured more people than I can name.  Although my intentions were to keep the punch from ever being delivered, it seems that my method of escaping such an action was more like a drop kick to the face.  So...


4.  When it comes to hurting someone, apologize whether you think you were wrong or not.
Folks will disagree with me on this, and that's all right.  It just continues to ring true in my life.  There will be times when you're put between a rock and a hard place, where no matter what decision you make, someone is going to be disappointed.  The truth is going to hurt, and no matter how many kind words you toss in there, when you get right down to the nitty gritty, you're still practically hitting them in the face.  So when the smoke clears, don't go back on your decision.  Hold the ground you knew you had to own, but don't be heartless--at least apologize.  It gives value to the other person, and although it may not make everything peachy, it is at least a way to care.  Because the real trouble comes when you stop caring about the way you make someone feel.

And in the spirit of being totally and completely unrelated to the rest of a conversation...

5.  Learn to laugh at yourself.
I'm stealing this from probably every piece of advice I've heard, but I firmly believe that a certain level of sanity that is found in laughing at yourself.  Like this week, for example.
I had those lovely wisdom teeth of mine removed, and in the midst of writing my last will and testament as soon as the anesthesia began to wear off, I got to see a reflection of myself.  Despite the...well...not-so-lovely recovery moments, I had to laugh at the fact that I looked like an obese chipmunk.  I would show you a picture, but I'm not laughing quite that hard.  =]  Here's the best I can do:

Life exponentially increases in goodness when you can find something to laugh at in the midst of something that could make you cry.  So when someone decides it's a good idea to poke fun at you, instead of acting like a drama queen and pulling out the water works, all because someone laughed at your awkwardness, weird shaped nose, or unjustifiable clumsiness, just laugh along with them.  No one wants to be around someone who requires others to walk on eggshells.

Well that's that.  Have a blessed day.  =]

³ And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; ⁴ and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; ⁵ and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.   

Romans 5:3-5 

Break

It's been a while since I posted five lessons that the previous week brought me, and this past one has definitely brought about some pointers.  Not bad, necessarily--just not what I had expected.

1.  It doesn't matter how mad you get at someone--they still face battles you can only dream of.  
And for that reason, forgiveness has to be a priority.  I'm stomping on my own toes here, so don't for even a minute think that I'm immune from this.  When someone despises you without a legitimate reason and tells everyone who will listen lies about you, among the easiest things to do is let anger take over every thought of that person.  The thing is, regardless of what he or she did to you, that person has a life as intricate and complex as your own.  It's necessary to forego revenge in spite of an injury. I'm not saying it's easy, or that I've mastered the art of forgiving, but the more I learn in this life, the more I realize that it does a lot more good to put more value on a person rather than their injustice.

2.  When everything around you is crumbling, look for grace.
A professor told me this last year, and it rings true in nearly every situation I find myself in.  My grandfather went to the ER on the night I came in for Spring Break.  He's had several problems before, but this one is...well...just not good is probably the best way I can put that without being too open.  He has his good moments, as well as his not-so-good moments, but he seems to be improving for the most part.
Here's the grace:  I was home for this.  It's not a selfish sort of "I was home to see my grandfather" sort of grace, but rather, a blessing that I was here to encourage and support my family throughout all of this. I don't think I can easily describe the anxiety that one can feel when he or she is more than a 10 minute drive from a loved one in case something goes wrong.  It's pure agony to long to hug someone who cries on the phone with you while you sit in a dorm room 2.5 hours away.  Being able to be here to give hugs when they're needed, and not limit myself to a 7 minute phone call on the way to class has been a merciful gift from God.






3.  Correcting without encouraging is just a glorified way to discourage.  


While I will definitely agree that correction is a valuable part of friendship, so is encouragement.  If you can remember the last Bible verse you tossed at someone to tell him or her that they were living incorrectly, but can't remember the last kind word you graced your friend with, then maybe it's time to change your angle.  I'll leave it at that.




4.  You're never too young (or too old) to reminisce about the past....  
My lovely sister and I spent the morning playing old TV show theme songs and letting the other one guess what song it was from.  Everything from Barney to Gulla Gulla Island to The Rugrats, to Recess.  It's the simple things, I suppose.  "Ohh, I bet you'll never guess this one!"  "NO WAY!  I can't believe I forgot that show!!"  Sometimes that's where you've got to find something to smile about.
With that said, however...

5.  But be sure to tread past waters carefully.
The past can be filled with lots of hurt and things that do you no good to think about.  Don't live there. Let it be a detour you take, but don't let it be a rest stop.  You can't change it, so you've got to learn from it.  I know you've heard that before, but it never hurts to be reminded.


Take care.  =]

Early Morning Reflections

Good morning!

Jeremiah 29:11 is a lovely verse.  Truly.  Even in the context it's used in, it still says amazing things about God.

For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.

Before you begin to think that I'm going to bash this verse, let me ease your worries.  I'm not.  I just noticed something that I had not been taught before.  


This week needed to end.  Fact of life, I suppose.  It's not that I do not appreciate the blessings of this week, but merely that I am so drained that I am pretty sure that if my classes did not end at noon yesterday, I would not have lasted until the weekend.  All right, so that's the background story.  Now, picture this:  I'm in that mindset when reading Jeremiah yesterday morning--the one where I think the day hasn't even started and it already needs to end.  Well, The Lord is telling Jeremiah to tell the exiles that He sent to Babylon to make lives where they are.  Build houses, and eat the food they grow (29:5); get married and have sons and daughters (29:6); move ahead with their lives despite being in exile (29:7).  But here was the kicker.  This is the verse that snapped me out of that early-morning blahh and into a full out "What did he just say?"

Jeremiah 29:10
For thus says the LORD, "When seventy years have been completed for Babylon, I will visit you and fulfill My good word to you, to bring you back to this place."

Seventy. Years.  Seventy?  You mean just seven, right?  The "-ty" was a typo, yes?  And maybe someone accidentally mistranslated "days" to "years" because a single week is long enough to start wearing at my faith, much less SEVENTY YEARS.  That's 3640 weeks, plus a couple of days for leap years.  No ma'am.  Good day to you, sir.  


It is a daunting--and terrifying--realization to see that.  But it's also very humbling, and the more that I think on this passage the more I realize just how sovereign God is.  My faith is so small sometimes.  Some days, I can feel it expanding beneath my feet, taking me to far distant places to do God's work for me, and some days, I can hardly balance one foot on it, much less walk with it.  I get to a point where I begin to wonder and question Him.  Why did that have to happen?  What good did that do?  So how do You expect me to move on from here?  Weren't You supposed to keep that kind of thing from happening?   What are You doing, now?  Where are Your works?  I ask far too many questions sometimes...
The thing is, He's sovereign.  His will is bigger than my own, and believe me when I say that that is such a blessing.

There will be things that we do not understand, and there are going to be times when God's plan and ours do not line up (I'm sure there were a few exiles that were questioning, "What was that for?").  There are things that we simply cannot change.  There are going to be days that are not OK, and sometimes a day is going to stretch into a week.  Sometimes it's one month, and other times it's nine.  This is something I've had to struggle with for the past few weeks, and please note, this next part is most definitely a Thus Saith Sara moment (and if you haven't picked up on those yet, I'm telling you to take it with a grain of salt):

The point of our lives is to give glory to the Most High Lord, who is able to do far more abundantly than anything we can imagine.  He's got it all sorted and figured out.  We will be put into situations that test and try us, and sometimes those situations will stretch out over time spans that make us want to prematurely surrender our last breaths.  It will not be easy, and we won't always feel like we're running on a week-after-church-camp-God-high, and we are going to fail sometimes.  We're human, after all.  When we go through those times, though, God's command to Jerusalem was to keep on going.Continue living in the circumstances that weren't exactly what the exiles had planned for themselves.

Life doesn't stop just because it ceases to be what we originally wanted.  

Keep running the race.  Keep fighting the good fight, because I promise you, just as God is able to deliver, He will.


And on a completely unrelated note, this made me smile, and I wanted to share it with you.  =]



Because I have a soft spot for awkward moments and can't help but want nothing more than to use this sometime.
























Have a blessed day!